Sometimes those who seem to be your worst enemies an turn out to be actually count you as a friend simply because you treat them with respect. I was tormented by a group of girls named Lisa in elementary. They are the reason why I learned french, I went to a different junior high to get away from these girls and the only was that it was possible for me to do this was to enroll in frnech immersion. There I got a chance to start over, meeting a totally new crowd of people. This time I was better prepared to deal with being rejected by people. I was used to sitting by myself and had learned how to bury myself in books to avoid people. I started to eat lunch with people in grade 7. I would talk to people in gym class and made friends in my section in band. Thank god for band, with out it I don't know what I would have done. When I was feeling overwhelmed with people, I never was one of the cool kids, they continued to disdain me, I went and played my trombone. I learned so much that year. I got confidence by finally doing something that others couldn't and that didn't carry huge steryotypes or cliques in it. Playing trombone gave me something to hide behind. It was common knowledge that trombones were either introverts or huge extroverts, I had a built in excuse to go and hide by myself in the corner. I started to actually talk to other people. I got to know some of the grade 8s, they accepted me and I could spend time with them hanging out in the art room, laughing with Mr. J. Then I met a group of friends, who were like me, outcasts from the cool people. they were rather goth and I got really into that. I still like it, I find it interesting and it is part of me that I could accept and it allowed me to get away with wearing hoodies and baggy clothing without people judging me too hardly. It also, for the first time gave me an identity. Here I was introduced to a lot of things, makeup... Jonny Depp, obsessions, as well as dragons, gothic culture, art and metal music. Its funny, I was hanging with a whole bunch of gothic people, but all the smart people, or the people who didn't fit in else where were there too. One of my most intelligent friends was met during this period, sitting on the bench out side of the art room. With him I discovered the joy about talking about books and started to make comparisions and arugements supporting my ideas about them. This is a skill that I use daily. Our simplistic arguements back in junior high eventually stemmed to what we do today, constant bickering and teasing. Grade 9 was a turning point for me. I started to become who I am today.

The summer between grade 9 and 10 was the most influential in my life, as well as the one where I learned the most. I lived at a stable for 6 weeks and learned so much. I learned to ride any horse I was asked to get on. I learned how to take care of 12 kids at a time and how to keep them safe around horses. I learned basic vetting, tacking up english, western, dressage. I learned to lead horses while riding on, I learned the basics of so many things. The only time I left that barn was to act as a groom for my friend who was teaching me basic dessage and to go to band camp. That band camp was one of the best times of my life. I lived in a dorm with my best friend, I got the experience of actually playing trombone and feeling competent in my skills on it. I took my first trombone lesson, played with some amazing players and got the foundation for where I am today. Because it was an olympic year, we did band olympics. We did events like conducting, learning another instrument, relays, writing songs and my favorite Marching Band. This was my first experience with marching band besides the recruitment videos I saw every year in band class. I was lucky and had a Stampede DM in my group, so we actually got to march properly and had really formations and subsets. I think we might have won the competition. Right after this I competed in my first rodeo and lost horribly but had so much fun while doing it. I was riding a 4 year old horse who I was training and we were able to compete both english and western without any major problems, they were all rider error, I had never done anything like that before. I learned to lead out trail rides, take a horse swimming and do all sorts of things that you simply don't get to do when you ride a urban stable. I had two of my own horses, Magic and Smoky, no one else could do anything with them. Magic was my all around mare, we could do anything and I tried to buy her but I couldn't afford to keep her in Calgary. Smoky was the horse I was training, we started learning to jump, run barrels and also learn the basics like standing to be tacked up and groomed, we learned ground trying, being comfertable in any saddle and discipline. I also had an evil pony names Whisper, who I was breaking to ride. This stupid mare nearly killed me. I got her to the point where we could walk out the trail head without any explosions or balking and then turn around and walk comfertably back without a fight or jigging. I learned so much from her.

In grade 10, I came in as the shy girl. One boy who seemed to be in all my classes on the first day said Hi to me and he totally changed my life that day. I went home for lunch happy, for the first time since moving to Calgary, 5 years later. This boy was cute, I had a crush on him from the first time he stopped by my locker to say hi and then he got swept away by the crowd taking the short cut by the library. This boy taught me so much. I went home, not knowing his name, but already considering him to be a very good friend. We played in the same section and we very quickly became unseperable. I learned his name was Greg and he invited me to go to band camp with him, september of grade 10. He told it was a marching band and that he would like me to go see if I would enjoy it. When I got there, there was no question about whether or not I would going. I was given music and a intro to marching the Friday of band camp and then I dove in head first and never looked back. 5 years and two bands later I still love it. Sure that first year was a bit of gong show, but nothing compares to marching your first Fanfare or parade. Playing rock paper scissors in the show or learning how to block for the first time. We had so many fun times, and I think that my first year of stetsons was one of the best years of my life. I did so much and learned to much. I made friends and was accepted as member of a group. No one cared who I was, as long as I did my job as well as possible. It was marching band which got me through high school. I made friends who stayed with me through all of school, working hard together towards a common goal is a very good motivator and group strengthener. I learned so much in stetsons, I travelled overseas and to the states. I march in parades and field shows. I got to compete in a world championship and place 13th. I learned to play percussion and learn how to read treble clef. I got to play fun music and some really hard music. It helped me grow so much as a person and as a musician. I lost a lot of friends too. Because I loved marching band, people who didn't like it or gave up on it shunned me because of my passion for it. I learned that I don't have to be friends with everyone, but I do have to live with everyone so I need to treat them with respect and adknowledge them and their ideas. This is one of the greatest lessons I have ever learned in my life.

It has become even more important as I am doing things like university and stampede. I meet a ton of new people everyday and I have to work with them, because that is the way life is. I cannot choose to not work with someone, I may not like it, but I will still do everything that is asked of me, and usually more seeing that is how I am. Showband has taught me a lot. I have worked with some of the top musicians in the world and have had experiences that I would have never had if I wasn't in this band. I have seen a crowd leap to their feet in excitement. I have seen people cry because musical emotions. I have played and sang pieces written for my ensemble. I have slept overnight on a bus and been known internationally because of my tee shirt. Stampede has given me so many gifts. I know I can push myself beyond my physical limits and I can work through pain and problems and work until I succeed at it. I get to travel to Europe this summer and have a chance of going to worlds for a second time.

The showband also gave me one more great gift, a man who has helped me a lot. He taught me to trust and to love and to not be afraid to be me. He is probably the only person who knows me better then I know myself. He is like my twin and we are so similar it is almost scary some times. I love this man with all my heart and I believe that I can love him without people being judgemental of us. I think that this is what one might call a soul mate. I am not afraid to be myself and he lets me be free, which is something which I never had in another relationship.
This is almost 2000 words long, which means I need to move on. This is the longest blog post I have written ever.